Balancing The World

© Vlue

For years I had a job where at any given time, usually early in the morning, the phone would ring with some disaster that had to be fixed RIGHT THEN or either people would suffer, or great financial loss would occur, or both.

It was hugely stressful, and exciting, and scary, and frustrating and I was important. On a moments notice my travel bag and I could be off to Washington D.C. to meet with the very top people in the land.

Then one day the owner lost his mind, quit paying people, the shareholders sued, and the roof fell in so to speak and just like that, it was over.

Broke, because I was one of the unpaid, I decided it was time to take that Canon my husband had bought me for Christmas two years before, that I never had time to use, out of the box and follow my dream and go back into to the photography I had enjoyed as a young woman. In particular I wanted to do stock photography. (If I ever truly figure out what it is.)

But many mornings when my phone doesn’t ring I ask. Am I important? Is what I’m doing making a difference anymore? How did I get to this? I’d like to say “Yes, of course” and give you many reasons to back that up, except I still don’t really know.

I do know I wake up most days happy and with hope. Occasionally I wake up bemoaning my lack of funds and equipment but I have fun things in my fridge I get to write off. Remember those cherries in the red bowl? Well, after I photographed them...I ate them.

I plan trips to places I’ve wanted to go for a long time, like that wreck of the P-38 Lightning out in the desert 120 miles from my house. My mother’s father designed the P-38 and my father’s father flew them. I knew my mother’s father well, and my father’s father is still alive and loves to follow my adventures and this will make us both very happy. Plus, I get a four-hour hike and some one-on-one time with my adult daughter.

I now get to actually attend family events without having to slink off with my Blackberry and laptop to solve some crisis only to find when I am done the ball game, concert, birthday party or whatever, is over and everyone is annoyed with me. (Now I spend the whole time photographing the event, but that is somehow different.)

Am I making a difference no longer balancing the world?

I’m home with my husband. My dog is content to be able to sleep on my feet every night, because I am actually in my own bed. I got to go to on a bus with the families of the high school football team across the state to the finals and see my nephew play…..and I took my Granddaughter to the zoo.

What exactly is “important”?

“It is very easy to overestimate the importance of our own achievements in comparison with what we owe others. “

~Dietrich Bonhoeffer

Photo credits: Ginger Sanders, Vlue.

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July 26, 2011


You may not be "important" in the big world, but you are clearly important in your small world of family. And in the end, the people that remember us are the ones that love us! I'll bet your family is happier too.

July 25, 2011


Great blog ! Congrats !

July 21, 2011


Thanks everyone. Silent47. It is possible your place right now is to be where you can document the strife of your country. I remember your image was one of the first ones I fell in love where here on DT. I hope there are happier days ahead for you and your country and in the meantime make it count....and it's a reminder to me to not take our country for granted!

July 21, 2011


I like what you write. Very inspiring. The meaning of life is all in our interpretation. Chasing dreams - all the best in your photography and life. Cheers!

July 21, 2011


Well done ! Glad to hear you are enjoying life, An old guy I used to work with often remined me " THIS IS NOT A REHERSAL"... Only get one shot at life.... might as well make the most of it !
Dave. (Carpe diem)

July 21, 2011


wow.You make me think about my life.I have a lot to discover.Im sory i was born in a shity country.Well,maybe im still able to migrate somewhere where is more joy then sadness
   Running in the rain   

July 21, 2011



You've found the real important thing in life. Remember... There is no redundancy for time. At least that is what I've found. You've got to try before you die and the moment is NOW.

I must say its the best thing ever happened to me in my working life at all.

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