Play Stock Rank and Lose Your Self-Esteem
It's been a while since I wrote a blog, but due to the hundreds of you clamoring for another one, I decided it was time. Well, okay it wasn’t hundreds of you. Okay it was my mom.
What inspired my irritation this time was that I was bored so I played a few rounds of Stock Rank. Well if you must know, I played in order to make sure none of my images was in the “No Sales” category. And all I accomplished was lowering my score, which is displayed publicly for all to see and ridicule.
Time after time I would think, “Aha! No-Brainer!” but NOOOO! Wrong again! How can I be blamed? Who could have guessed that a girl in a bikini would beat out a nobbly background texture? I mean it did occur to me, but I thought, “Whoa I don’t care if she’s in a bikini, she’s real ugly,” but apparently nobody’s eyes go up that far. Who knew? I hate this game. At least I knew that a cute baby will beat an isolated radish.
Never mind. Once again, I am willing to share all of my dumb mistakes for you to profit from.. Here is what I learned:
1. Girl in Bikini beats background textures, cute babies, and puppies.
2. Attractive blond family beats isolated household objects.
3. Puppies and babies beat everything except ugly girls in bikinis.
4. Oversaturated green meadows beat vectors with half-tone banners.
5. Practically everything to do with guessing what sells beats Your Author.
Now what did I do with that bikini.